Minecraft vs Portal 1!
by joshman501
Summary: Minecraft Steve gets sucked into Portal 1, and now he must beat the game! Will he win, will he even survive? Read this awesome crossover to find out!


One day while mining in a cave deep underground, Steve discovered a secret underground room, made of metal. The room was hidden behind some cobblestone blocks and Steve didn't know how it got there. He was intrigued though, so he equipped his iron pickaxe and proceeded to break the iron blocks, hacking his way inside.

Once inside, Steve picked up the iron he mined, and placed a few torches while looking around. He then noticed that he was inside a big mostly empty metal room. It looked like an old abandoned laboratory, with empty chests, work benches, furnaces, cauldrons, and cobwebs everwhere. The people who built this place must have abandoned it long ago... That, or something went very wrong here...

After looking around some more, Steve found a hidden lever, behind an empty chest. After pulling it, a sticky piston door opened up in the wall, revealing a strange hidden Nether portal. It also had a sign saying 'This Portal leads to random Universe's. You never know where it will take you, and sometimes, you never return...Do not Enter! Sealed off until further notice.'

Steve didn't care about warnings though, and he was too intrigued to ignore the portal. "Why would they go through so much work to hide this portal? It probably just leads to the Nether world like all normal portals." Steve thought to himself. "Oh well, time to check it out." Said steve.

Before he went in though, He made a few preparations. First he made some more tools, and repaired his old ones using the workbenches in the lab. Then he cooked some meat in the furnace near by, and crafted some bread, and cookies for the trip. After that, he crafted some quick iron armor using a few iron blocks from the lab.

He was going to craft a bed before entering so he could save his spot, but he didn't have any wool. He also didn't want to go to the surface to get any, so he decided to just go into the portal. "Here goes nothing", said Steve, as he stepped through the portal.

The Arrival:

After passing a long loading screen, Steve finally arrived, but he was no longer in Minecraft... He was in a strange world with non pixilated blocks. It was in a new world all together with HD walls, and floors. The graphics were so crisp compared to the world he was used too...

He was in some sort of glass box though, with a bed, a toilet, a radio, and a table. Luckily, he still had all of his tools and items, and he looked exactly the same. He was about to break the glass with his pick axe, but then a robotic female voice came on the speaker. Steve listened closely.

"Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center. We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one. Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the tests... Wait a minute, who aare yooou? How did you get here? Why are you so square, and pixilated?" Said the voice as she adjusted her cameras. "My cameras must be malfunctioning. Can you speak? Do you understand me?" Said the voice.

After hearing that, Steve quickly typed out 2 wooden signs, and placed them on the ground, stating his reason for being there. They read: "I am Minecraft Steve. I come from another world made of blocks. I came here through a hidden portal."

The Ai zoomed it's cameras in and read the wooden signs that seemingly appeared out of nowhere. It quickly understood what happened.

"So, you are from another universe made of blocks?? You will be an interesting test subject then for portal testing... Also, I am Glad0s, the operator of this facility. Now stand back... The portal will open in 3, 2, 1..."

After she said that, a blue portal opened up on the wall, and Steve looked at it... It was different than a Nether portal, and he could see himself through it standing in the Glass box. It was strange, but he decided to proceed onward.

Before that though, he hit the bed, the toilet, the radio and the table with his pick axe, and turned them into items he could carry with him. They would be good souvenirs for when he returned home... After that, he proceeded through the blue portal, emerging from an orange portal on the wall outside of the box. He then proceeded to the next room for test 1.

Glados was intrigued seeing this strange square man shrink down the furniture in the box using only a pick axe. Then the man shoved the shrunken furniture into his pockets?? How strange... What else was he capable of?

Once Steve entered the next room, a cube dropped from the floor and Steve was supposed to pick it up, and carry it over to the button. Instead though, He just hit the cube and put it in his pocket. Then he hit the doors with his pick axe, and broke them down. After that, he saw the the emancipation field, which disintegrates all unauthorized testing equipment.

Steve didn't know that, but when he saw it, he knew better than to walk through it. He decided to break it with his pick axe like everything else and walked right into the elevator after that with all of his items. He was completing these tests his own way, and Glados was both angered, and intrigued.

In the next test chamber, Steve was supposed to wait for portals to open in glass rooms to complete a puzzle, but he just beat his way through the glass and chopped the doors down again, reaching the next elevator. Glados was starting to become angry with him now though, and she decided to speak up.

"You are not completing these tests correctly. Please do not destroy walls or doors. Doors will open once you complete the designated test."

Steve just ignored her though, and entered the next test chamber which contained the portal gun. Once entering it, he broke through the glass with his axe, and retrieved the gun in the middle of the room. He didn't even wait for Glados to give the introduction speach.

"You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. With it, you can create your own portals. These inter-dimensional gates have proven to be completely safe. The device, however, has not. Do not touch the operational end of the device. Do not look directly at the operational end of the device. Do not-"

Before she could finish explaining the gun though, Steve had portaled up to the elevator and proceeded onward to the next test chamber. "He has no patience at all." Thought glados.

After getting the portal gun, Steve flew through the tests, breaking down doors, placing ladders where needed, creating stair cases out of dirt blocks, and destroying security cameras using his bow and arrow. He had a nice collection of cameras in his inventory now, and he had lots of cool souvenirs. He didn't even need the portal gun because he could just break his way though walls and obstacles, but he kept it anyways.

When he reached the chamber that contained the dual portal gun, he just created a bridge of dirt, and walked over to it, picking it up, and breaking his way to the next chambers. Glados was dumbfounded and just watched him as he sped through the chambers.

Steve was having fun speeding through the chambers, but he didn't know how long they went on, and he was afraid he may run out of food soon... All the running and jumping was causing him to use alot of energy, and it was causing his food bar to drastically decrease. He had to hurry up and find a way out of the lab asap, but how?

He tried breaking holes in the walls, but behind each paneled wall, was a hard steel wall that was unbreakable, like bedrock. The ceiling and floor blocks were the same... Not even Tnt could break through the metal... and the glass observation rooms were no different. Behind each door, was a metal panel blocking the way... The only way out, was the elevators...

Meanwhile, Glados was just sitting back, watching Steve go, and taking good notes. She was fascinated by his ability to place blocks out of nowhere, and she was amazed seeing the blocks defy gravity. She was going to study these blocks later on, but for now, she had to continue watching Steve cheat his way through the tests... He couldn't cheat his way through the next one though... Or could he??

Part 2: Turrets/ conclusion:

After hacking his way through multiple doors, and walls, Steve had to stop for a moment because he reached a hard test chamber. It was a chamber that contained robots of some kind, and he had to use caution before entering this one...

"Do to mandatory scheduled maintanence, the appropriate chamber for this testing sequence is currently unavailable. It has been replaced with a live-fire course designed for military androids. The Enrichment Center apologizes for the inconvenience, and wishes you the best of luck." Said Glados.

Once Steve heard that, he knew danger was ahead. He didn't care though. He fought zombies, skeletons, and creepers before, so how hard could these turrets be? He then equipped his shield in left hand and his sword in his other hand, and rushed in.

As soon as he turned a corner, he knocked over the first turret, shrinking it down. He then put it in his inventory, and went further in. The next corner had another turret, and it caught him by surprise. He quickly blocked the bullets with his shield, but the shield was no match against the relentless stream of bullets. The shield broke and Steve ducked behind a wall before he got shot.

Steve then tried to place some dirt blocks so he could sneak by the turret, but it shot the blocks and made them dissappear. Steve then decided to shoot an arrow at the turret and that worked like a charm. The arrow hit the turret, and it fell over, spewing bullets in the process. One hit steve, causing him to loose a heart.

"Dang" Said steve. "These turrets are harder than they look." But then he had an idea...

He placed down a block of tnt, then he equipped the dual portal gun. After that he shot a blue portal at the ground, and shot a red portal above the turrets in the big room. Then his lit the tnt and kicked it into the portal. The tnt landed right by the turrets, and blew them up, blowing square chunks out of the ground as well. Steve did this 2 more times, then tunneled his way out of the chamber and into the elevator.

Glados was surprisingly impressed and entertained from his performance, and she continued to watch and take notes. She was no longer getting angry at Steve, and she knew that She could always kill him whenever she wanted too...

The conclusion :

After running through multiple tests, Steve finally reached the last test...

"Welcome to the final test. When you are done, you will drop the device in the Equipment Recovery Annex. Enrichment Center regulations require both hands to be empty before any cake-" Said Glados.

Steve was exited to hear that this was the last test, and he couldn't wait to get back home with his new loot. He also couldn't wait to cook some food at home, and test out the portal gun in his own universe, if it was even possible to return to his own universe...

"Alright, let's do it!" Said steve, as he broke through a panel of glass and made a bridge to the end of the chamber... When he got there though, he noticed it was a trap room full of fire! Just then, a strong metal wall closed behind him, cutting off his bridge. He tried breaking it with his pick axe but it was no use.

"Congratulations. The test is now over. All Aperture technologies will remain safely operational up to 4000 degrees Kelvin. Rest assured that there is absolutely no chance of a dangerous equipment malfunction prior to your victory candescence. Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity. Goodbye." Said Glad0s.

Just then the metal wall behind Steve started sliding forward, pushing Steve further into the fire. Steve started to panic, and tried placing blocks to stop the wall, but it was no use. The heat from the fire was staring to hurt him, and he was loosing hearts fast now.

It was all so fast, but at the last second, he remembered the bucket of water he had in his inventory. He quickly equipped it, and dumped it onto the fire, extinguishing it for good. The pixilated blue water filled the floor of the room, and fogged up the room with hot steam.

He breathed a sigh of relief, and jumped into the water, cooling himself off. He then built a ladder up to the railing above and looked for an escape.

"What are you doing? Stop it! I-i-i-i-i-... Weeee are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you. We are very very happy for your success. We are throwing a party in honor of your tremendous success. Place the device on the ground, then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides. A party associate will arrive shortly to return you to your universe. Make no further attempt to leave the testing area. Assume the 'Party Escort Submission Position' or you will miss the return portal." Said Glados.

Steve ignored her though, and was just determined to escape. Maybe he could find her and kill her before he left. It would probably be just like the time he killed the Ender Dragon...

So after more escaping through a giant maze of tunnels, and puzzles, Steve finally made it to Glados. He found her home chamber at last, but he was amazed to see that she was actually a giant AI super computer, suspended from the ceiling...

"Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it? Because despite your violent behavior, the only thing you've managed to break so far is my heart. Maybe you could settle for that, and we'll just call it a day. I guess we both know that isn't going to happen. You chose this path, now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in five... four... Time out for a second. That wasn't supposed to happen. Do you see that thing that fell out of me? What is that? It's not the surprise... I've never seen it before. Nevermind, it's a mystery I'll solve later, by myself, because you'll be dead."

Said Glados, who just accidentally dropped a metal ball from her body.

Steve looked around for a moment, then decided to shoot some arrows at her to test them out.They just bounced off though, and she just laughed and made rude comments.

After that, Steve went over and tried hitting her with his sword, but that didn't work either. Then he swung his sword at the metal ball on the floor, and broke it, causing it to shrink and go into Steves inventory.

"You are kidding me! Did you just stuff that Aperture-Science-Thing-We-Don't- Know-What-It-Does into your inventory? Thas got to be the dumbest thing that- Whoa, Whoa, WHOAAA... Heh heh heh heh...

Good news. I figured out what that thing you just pocketed did. It was a Morality Core they installed after I flooded the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin to make me stop flooding the enrichment center with a deadly neurotoxin. So get comfortable while I warm up the Neurotoxin Emitters."

Said Glados as she started flooding the room with gas.

Steve panicked after that and decide he needed to hurry up for real this time. His health was already pretty low, and this gas would be the death of him if he didn't hurry up.

Just then, a rocket turret popped out of the ground, and started firing rockets at Steve. He blocked them using blocks of cobblestone, and various blocks he acquired from walls in Aperture Science.

They worked well at stopping rockets, but then he had a better idea... Using his 5 remaining blocks of tnt, he ran up under Glados and placed a block before running away again. Each time he placed a block of tnt, the rocket turret would shoot it, and it would hurt Glados, causing another metal ball to fall off.

Each time a core fell off of her, Steve would run up, and break it with his sword, causing her to glitch out more.

Steve did this a few more times, until finally, she died, and started breaking apart. Steve quickly built a little Stone bunker to protect himself from danger, but the explosion sucked him up him along with the blocks to the sky... Everything went white after that...

When Steve woke up, he was back in his universe at his house, next to his bed. Every thing looked normal again, thank goodness... He quickly checked his inventory to see if he still had his stuff and he did!

He quickly placed his new portal furniture down, and he put his new items in a hidden crate in his house. He placed his new HD portal bed by his Minecraft bed, and he placed his new HD toilet in his bathroom. He also placed his new Aperture Science radio by his bed, and it was still pumping out the same music from when he found it. Much better than Minecraft jukebox music at least.

Then he went outside with his new portal gun and tested it out. It worked perfectly! Just like it did while in Aperture Science! He couldn't wait to show it to his friends, but in all of his excitement, Steve made the worst mistake possible...

He accidentally shot a portal at the moon, and it sucked him up, along with his house, and 1'000s of blocks of dirt. Steve quickly ran out of oxygen while floating in space, and he died, loosing all of his inventory in the process...

When he respawned, he was back near where his house used to be, and he was standing in a giant crater. The portals were gone as well, and all evidence was lost. He had no proof now, and his friends would never believe his story... He searched for that hidden cave portal again and he searched for days, but he could never find it...

Maybe one day, he will find it again, and return to Aperture, to prove to his friends what he saw... In the mean time, he will search the caves...

The End!!

(Be sure to also check out my Pikmin vs Portal Story!)

Thanks for reading!


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